Potty-mouths and false friends
This time there is a tenuous connection between the photo and the post. When hiking with groups, the code for veering off the trail for a potty break is “looking for a green door”. The code used to be picking strawberries, but that made no sense in January and could prompt offers of unwanted company in May or June. While the post is about potty-talk, not potties, the photo also brings back hiking memories for me personally, and anyone who has hiked with me will get the joke.
Anyway. This week my intention was for something philosophical and / or profound. But with the US election, my brain needs a rest from deep thinking so here goes something light.
If you are a long-time resident in Spain you already know about the casual attitude towards profanity in this country. If you are a new resident, or still learning Spanish, you might be in for some surprises. And it’s not just the young. Men and women who are no longer (chronologically) young use language that sometimes makes me cringe or roll my eyes.
Now I’m no prude, “just” solidly middle-class and Midwestern. My maternal grandfather apparently used “fudge” if he was really, really angry; his oldest daughter (my mom) said “eef, eef, eef”, both infrequently used and probably sanitized versions of the f-word. Never heard my dad say anything worse than a very occasional “damn”. For the record, all of the numerous Pinder-kids are fairly fluent in naughty words, so for me to notice profanity, it has to be extreme or unusual in style and amount.
One interesting difference? The Spanish words for “hell” and noun “sh**” are not a big part of Spanish profanity. They’re more imaginative with their curses, even if they don’t always make a lot of sense. I mean, “go fry asparagus” instead of go to hell?
Let’s get the shocker out of the way immediately. It’s that shudder-inducing four-letter word for part of the female anatomy, curiously, starting with “c” in both languages. In the USA it is taboo, though read an article saying it’s not so bad in UK and Australia. In Spain that word is so frequently used it is almost like “golly gee”, and used by just about everyone. Truly cringe-worthy for me, even after all these years. Slight detour on the same topic: when corresponding with Spanish-speakers, best to avoid signing the American “xoxo” for hugs and kisses, which is another slang term for the same c-word, with the “x” pronounced as “ch”. Don’t go there, except as a joke with someone you know very well, and clarifying beforehand.
Spain’s F-bomb word is a five-letter j-word, used as frequently or more here than in the USA; it’s practically neutral, though if you want to sanitize a little “jopelín” or just “jo” work quite nicely.
Another cringe-word for me is “hostia”, meaning host, not as in a person, but a that important part of Communion in church. I’m not very religious, but that use of that word? No, just no. The sanitized version “hosti” is not much better – and curiously, a serious blow to part of your anatomy, accidental or done by someone else, can be an “hostia” or even a “leche” (milk).
“Leche” leads into another category: pooping in odd or forbidden places, using that five-letter verb starting with “C”. (notice I am sanitizing my language to try to foil the profanity filters). Pooping in the milk is an expression of anger or dismay. Pooping in the sea (“mar”) is somewhat stronger, and is a sanitized version of pooping on the mother who bore someone, which is a quite strong, direct curse when someone is really angry. And last but not least “pooping something” – not pooping on something – means messing something up.
Those are the most frequently used and useful naughty words in Spanish. There are entire other categories for making love and for getting drunk. Maybe another time…..
And false friends? In this context they’re not a friend that did you wrong, but words that don’t translate the way you might expect. There are others, but the ones we all need to remember are “embarazada” which is not embarrassed but pregnant, and “constipada” which is not constipated but congested / having a cold. Another that actually came out of my own mouth early in my time in Spain: I actually said “sopa” which means soup when I meant soap (very embarrassing, my boyfriend laughed uproariously).
And just in case, a reminder and a suggestion: language learning can be a challenge. To be successful, you really do have to make the leap to bumble along in your new language, and explain around something or extrapolate with knowledge you already have. But use extrapolation with care: a friend likes to tell a story about her newly-arrived self, going to the market to get a stewing hen to make soup. She knew the word for chicken was “pollo” so she did the logical extrapolation, deleting the last “o” and adding an “a” to make the word feminine. She confidently asked for her hen at a chicken shop, didn’t quite understand the shopkeepers little smile as he clarified the size, whether she wanted the head or not, whether she wanted it whole or chopped up. Nor did she understand the giggles of the women behind her in line, though by the time the shopkeeper handed her a nicely wrapped package with her hen, repeating her word several times (to the amusement of other clients) she began to suspect that her extrapolated word meant something else entirely.
And indeed it does. Ummm. Part of the male anatomy, curiously also a five-letter word starting with “p”, just like her guess-word extrapolated from the Spanish word for chicken. She lived in that neighborhood for years but never, ever went back to that chicken shop.